(Source: eeisenberg, via seanianjones)
AVENGE ME HAMLET
FOR I WAS KILLED BY YOUR UNCLE, AND MY BROTHERReblogging for that comment omg
(via texturepresence)
How to tell the difference between different genres of metal
- POWER METAL: The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
- THRASH METAL: The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.
- HEAVY METAL: The protagonist arrives on a Harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.
- FOLK METAL: The protagonist arrives with some friends playing accordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave........ without the princess.
- VIKING METAL: The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.
- DEATH METAL: The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.
- BLACK METAL: The protagonist IS the dragon, dwells in the heart of the night with in a castle full of hellhounds and eternal flames. He kills the sassy knight, fucks the noble steed and sacrifices the princess to Satan.
- GORE METAL: The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her. Then he fucks the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time.
- DOOM METAL: The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.
- PROGRESSIVE METAL: The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the 'HEAVY METAL' protagonist.
- GLAM METAL: The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink colour.
- NU METAL: The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.
(Source: kscodelario, via seanianjones)
Quote with no context!
00:05 <Texture> /I was thinking sorceress mind controlling women into ladies
of the night
00:05 <Texture> /with promises of free health care
00:05 <Texture> /and birth control
00:05 <Texture> /basically Planned Parenthood viewed through Republican eyes
- Laziness– The quality that makes you go to great effort to reduce overall energy expenditure. It makes you write labor-saving programs that other people will find useful, and document what you wrote so you don’t have to answer so many questions about it. Hence, the first great virtue of a…
"15:43 But I always think of it as, “I *am* a soul, and I *have* a
body.”
15:43 And I would be super pissed if my body was going around
killing people without my permission. "
body.”
15:43
killing people without my permission.
— Texture, on the zombie apocalypse
“Lambda functions don’t need names. It’s like a one-night stand.”
I taught my first computer science discussion today.
…
I think my teaching skills need work.
"I can’t; I have lab."
— most common phrase when asked to hang out (via sciencemajrproblems)
